THE FRONT PAGE:
Alea jacta est - 10/17/2006 - Cory is going through and updating things. If you've been waiting for the updates he would apologize if he was sober. Since he isn't, we aren't bothering him. He has a big stick and a handgun, and when he gets like this, we tend to just throw him cookies.
He also writes reviews of comics for people who don't read comic books for Bartcop Entertainment, and those are usually on that page on Wednesdays, but don't count on it. He also does some reviews for this website if you peel through the ads and look around.
Oh, and for those of you who need it, here is a simple disclaimer.
Welcome to the home of Solitaire Rose Productions, the writing concern of Cory!! Strode, king of the Lousy Rat Bastards!
Just what the flaming blue hootie have you stumbled in to? We're glad you asked. If you’ve never been here before, click on the Guinness to see just what this site is all about.
Then you can learn about all the wonders of the site and where to read all the things Cory!! has written. After he passes out, those fragments of English are whipped into shape by his army of genetically altered armadillos who put up his ravings whilst he attempts to do what F. Scott Fitzgerald did so well.
Drink himself to death.
If you like your wit delivered as tongue in cheek as a lesbian orgy, you've found the right website. If you don't like written humor, or are illiterate and the words on the site make you angry, we have a pearl of wisdom for you: Life Sucks, Wear A Hat.
In addition, here at Solitaire Rose Productions we welcome YOUR input about like we welcome a sharp blow to the head. So leave us alone and don't bother to e-mail the lousy rat bastard himself .
You could complain about the colors chosen, the attitudes expressed or the look of the site, but your complaint will fall on deaf ears. No one listens to us, so why should we listen to you? Why Do YOU Think you are so special?
Because you aren't, you know.
If you were, you wouldn't have time for this crap.
You can receive the Weekly News Update, this site's crowing achievement and claim to endless glory via e-mail every Monday night by joining the WNU mailing list. Also available is Cory!!'s fiction list, which he sends out whenever he writes something new, and he needs to get his lazy ass typing instead of surfing for porn involving Parker Posey. To join either list, enter your e-mail address into the box(es) in the left frame and click submit.
So look around. If you like what you see, tell your friends. If you don’t, tell people you hate because it’s a great shitty trick to play on them. There are people who buy him drinks to get him to ramble, but now through the miracle of the interwebthing, you can get it in the comfort of your own home, in your pajamas. You are wearing pajamas, aren't you?
You can also get it at work, if you're goofing off. And don't think we won't tell your boss.
Here's our banner, so promote this site and we'll give you a big wet, sloppy kiss on the lips next time we see you.
© 2006 Solitaire Rose Productions. So there.
Is there anyone we haven't offended yet? If so, let us know, as we need new targets.